Kyou Kara Ore Wa!!
	 Volume 1
	  Chapter 4
	   Criminals

 - Page 79 -

Chapter 4 : Criminals

 - Page 80 -

Mitsuhashi: Hey, you got one of those Nintendo's, right?  (lemme borrow it)

Itou: You don't think I'm actually going to lend you the entire thing, do you...?

Teacher: HEY!!  MITSUHASHI!!  ITOU!!

Both: Oh, hi sensei!  Bye, sensei!!

Teacher: (HEY)
	Hey, now let's not beat aroun' da bush here, yeah?  (dis is a rough school)
	But youse guys don't gotta look like dat, now do ya?  Can'tcha find a more NORMAL way of lookin' like punks?!

 - Page 81 -

Mitsuhashi: I don't think you understand, sensei.
	I'm only half Japanese.  I've got foreign blood in my veins.
	This is actual blond hair!!

Teacher: Then bring me a photo of you as a kid!!

Mitsuhashi: (oh, uh) Well, I've never turned out well in photos, so I don't have any!!

Teacher: And what about your hair, Itou?

Itou: It's bed-head...

Teacher: All right, if I see you looking like that tomorrow,
	this is what happens!!

Razor: (zzzr)(zrrr)

Teacher: I hear you sophomores are stronger than the seniors... (zzzz)
	But I'm fourth level in karate!!

 - Page 82 -

Mitsuhashi: Hey, mommmmmm.
	Do I have any foreign blood in me?
	Prob'ly not.  If I did, I'd be able to keep my hair like this.  (not that I'm gonna change it back)

Mother: Oh, but my cousin Yuki-chan has a foreign husband.

Mitsuhashi: No, it's gotta be one of my ancestors!!
	(yo) (step)

Foreigner: <Excuse me!!>

 - Page 83 -

Foreigner: <Oh, thank God.  Excuse me, have you seen a little child walking around?>

Mitsuhashi: (sounds like this)
	(SMILE)

Foreigner: <Oh, so you have!  She's about this tall.>

Mitsuhashi: (sounds like this)
	(smile)(smile)
	YANKEE
	GO HOME!!  (just a random selection of english words he knows)

Foreigner: (oh my God)

Mitsuhashi: <Mayonnaise, Ketchup, American Coffee, Mild Seven>  (a Japanese brand of cigarettes)

Foreigner: (oh no)

Mitsuhashi: <Good bye!!!>

 - Page 84 -

Mitsuhashi: (GEH)

Hand: (GRAB)

Foreigner: <Found you, ya blond bastard!!  What did you do with the girl?!
	Don't think you'll get away with this, you little...!!>

Mitsuhashi: (as usual, *symbols* is all he hears)
	WHAT THE HELL
	ARE YOU DOING?!!

 - Page 85 -

Mitsuhashi: Damn, what's going on today?!  (is Japan being occupied?)
	(suta suta) (I am invincible as usual, of course)

Hand: (tug tug)

Mitsuhashi: THAT'S ENOUGH ALREADY!!
	JERKOFF!!

Head: (WHAM)

Girl: W...
	W... w...

 - Page 86 -

Girl: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH
	WAAAAAAAAAAHH WAAAAAAAAAAHH

Mitsuhashi: {Awww, crap!!}

People: (what?)(what?)(what's going on?)(what?)
	(whoaa)(whoaa)

 - Page 87 -

Sign: Candy Store

Girl: (candy)

Mitsuhashi: (I hardly ever do this for anyone)

Lady: Isn't it nice to have such a loving brother?

Mitsuhashi: Brother?
	Hi there, sensei!!

Girl: (lick lick)

 - Page 88 -

Teacher: Where'd you buy that huge doll?!
	(I want one, too)

Itou: (lolita complex)

Mitsuhashi: Oh come on, sensei, that's my sister.
	Now do you believe I'm half-Japanese?

Teacher: Umm...

Girl: (heeheehee) (poke poke)

Teacher: Hmmmm.
	(doesn't seem like she couldn't be his sister, but oh man what should I go with?)

Girl: (NYUM NYUM)

Teacher: I see...  sorry for doubting you.  (too cute)

Mitsuhashi: (HAHAHA)

Girls: (kya)(kya)
	(so cute)
	(what's your name?)

Itou: You're such a damn liar!!

 - Page 89 -

Itou: HEY
	Wouldn't you call that kidnapping?
	YEAH...?

Mitsuhashi: (Kidnapping?!)

 - Page 90 -

Mitsuhashi: (YOU RETARD)
	I c-c-c-c-c-

Itou: Cock-a-doodle-doo?

Mitsuhashi: Caught her off the street!!

Itou: She's not a dog or a monkey, you don't catch her!!

Mitsuhashi: (BWF)

Itou: All right, now listen!!

Mitsuhashi: (I didn't think you caught monkeys either)

Itou: (Itou's Imagination)

**Mitsuhashi: I'LL BUY YOU SOME CANDY.

**Girl: Okay.

**Mitsuhashi: NOW COME WITH ME FOR A WHILE.

**Girl: Okay.

Itou: If that's not kidnapping, then WHAT IS, MI-TSU-HA-SHI-KUN?!

 - Page 91 -

Itou: You're a criminal from now on!!  (nice knowin' ya)

Big Seal: (CRIMINAL)  <- stigma

Other Seals: (no thank you)
	(unquestionable)

Itou: What are you doing?!
	Whoa, whoa.

Mitsuhashi: Throwing her away, just like a dog or cat!!
	(FLASH)
	(trip)

Itou: Whoa, careful!!  (grab)

 - Page 92 -

Mitsuhashi: Itou...  you just helped me, didn't you...?

Itou: Ah!

Mitsuhashi: Accomplice!!

Itou: (no fair)

Girl: (lick lick)

Itou: You really gonna leave her here?

Mitsuhashi: (don't sweat it)
	Some nice person'll come and pick her up!!

Girl: (lick lick)
	(lick lick)

 - Page 93 -

Mitsuhashi: Well, I'm busy, so I'll be heading home now.

Itou: (blink blink)
	(blink blink)
	{What a devil.  A demon.  Doesn't he have a heart in his chest?}

Mitsuhashi: {I can't...
	I can't do it!!}
	(tremble)

Itou: {Just wait, little girl!!
	He...
	Well, I guess there are no evil people in the world after all.}
	(gasa)

Mitsuhashi: Me?

Girl: "Don't know him."

Mitsuhashi: Good, good!  Very smart girl!!

 - Page 94 -

Mitsuhashi: And this?

Girl: "Know him."

Mitsuhashi: Then what...?

Girl: "Kidnapper"!!

Mitsuhashi: That's RIGHT!!  You're so SMART!!
	Here's some chocolate for you!  (rub rub)

Rock: (CRACK)

Itou: Why you filthy...
	What is WRONG with you, man?!

Mitsuhashi: What are we gonna do about her, then?

Itou: I don't know, you found her.

Mitsuhashi: (pik)
	(trash bag impersonations)

SFX: police sirens

 - Page 95 -

Mitsuhashi: That was scary.

Itou: Enough jokes, man!  We're running out of options!!

Girl: "Kidnapper"

Mitsuhashi: Yeah, well I wasn't laughing...

Women: It seems really agitated around here.
	Yes, I heard a little foreign girl was kidnapped.
	And they know who did it.  It was some blond man...

Itou: Oh, I just remembered something I have to do!!
	Oh here, I'll lend you some money...
	Later!!  (don't worry about paying me back)

Mitsuhashi: If they catch me, I'll tell them I had an accomplice!!
	(I'll tell them, I swear)
	(Swear on my life)
	(if it kills me or not)

Itou: (what a jerk)

Woman: Ah, that little girl!!
	They've got the little foreign girl!!

 - Page 96 -

Girl: (don't know him)

 - Page 97 -

Mitsuhashi: {I ain't gettin' caught here!!}

Itou: (awawa)

Mitsuhashi: Stupid cops!!
	The world revolves around me!!
	(Nyaaaah)

Police: (crazy bastards)

Itou: (Damn that hurt)

Mitsuhashi: (slip)
	(BONK)

Itou: (bwahahaha)
	(kyahahaha)

 - Page 98 -

Itou: What is doing this supposed to accomplish?

Mitsuhashi: Now we can get ransom money for her!!
	We'll skip outta town!!  The world revolves around me!!

Itou: I'm gonna be a first-class felon by the time this is over...

Mitsuhashi: First, we'll hide out in my house!!

Itou: What a stupid-looking house...

 - Page 99 -

Police: You boys really screwed up big-time!!

Itou: Busted...

Woman: Shirley!!

Police: Right over there!!

Woman: SHIRLEYYYY!!

Police: (Oh, how touching)
	You little punk!

Mitsuhashi: (no, it wasn't me!)

Itou: (I hate you)

Woman: That's not her!!

Girl: (lick lick)

 - Page 100 -

Woman: Shirley has black hair and dark skin, like us.

Police: That's why we asked for physical features...
	Inspector!  The kidnapper has turned himself in!

Man: I'm so sorry, ma'am!!  (she was just too cute)

Other Man: You sick bastard!!

Girl: (mamaaaa)

Mitsuhashi: Let me go, dammit!!

Policeman: Then why were you running?

Mitsuhashi: When I get chased, it makes me want to run!!
	(I mean, I AM a thug)
	Heh, you stupid pigs!!
	Come back the day before yesterday!!
	Goddammit, I just bought this thing.
	Good thing we aren't criminals after all, Itou.

Itou: HEY

 - Page 101 -

Itou: WHOSE KID IS THAT?!

Girl: Kidnapper Kidnapper

Mitsuhashi: Should have left her in the field...

Mother: (GARA)
	(oh) Welcome home, Takashi!!
	Ohhhh, Serika-chan, there you are.  (we were looking for you!)

Mitsuhashi: (glance)
	You know that thing?

Mother: Don't call her a "thing".
	She's Yuka-chan's daughter.  You know, the one who married the American.

Serika: Kidnapper Kidnapper

 - Page 102 -

Yuka: Oh, Taka-chan, hello.  (what happened to your hair?)

Mitsuhashi: ...y...  you guys were lying around for 5 or 6 hours while the kid was missing?  (mumble mumble mumble)

Itou: (PAT)

Mitsuhashi: ...Don't...  say...  a word...

Itou: (GAARRLLRL)

Mitsuhashi: (OWWW!)
	(GYAAAAAAAA)

Itou: (GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK)(GIVE ME MONEY FOR THE CLEANERS)(PAY ME FOR THE DOCTOR'S FEES)

Mitsuhashi: It's not my fault!!

 - Kyou Kara Ore Wa!!  Chapter 4 -